DREAM / The Prime Minister resigns and wakes up under the Parisian bridge!

 Kliko këtu për të tjera
Voxpress:

DILEMMA / Minister Frika Drifca studies the map of countries safe from extradition

2023-07-25 13:19:28Patronazhisti SHKRUAR NGA REDAKSIA VOX
DILEMMA / Minister Frika Drifca studies the map of countries safe from
Minister Frika Drifca inspecting the sunflowers

TIRANA - The news that the former Tigri was declared internationally wanted in 194 countries of the world, upset the agriculture-rural minister Frika Drifca. He had no idea that this small planet had so many countries. The former Tigrin had a superior and had respect for him, because he knew the history. Even at the beginning of his career, I Gjati used the case of the former Tiger as an example. Here's how you can become him, he told them, if you don't wear boots and fur on your feet, that is, become a tigress!

Frika knew the story of how the former techno-socialist felin, during the time of the opposition, entered the long-standing socialist president's office and said: Father, I want you to appoint me as a candidate for deputy in Korça and I will guarantee the victory. And he left some packages on the table. Some say they were packets of basmati rice, others that they were kritharaq.

But despite the contents of the package, the ex-Tiger's career, which was cut short when Tos Nano lost the election, has bounced back strongly. The more kritharaq (or basmati) he brought to the party, the higher he rose. And the tiger fable became a legend among the party technicians, who, unlike the old political grunts who enjoyed a new apartment or car, proved to be much more resourceful, up-to-date with technology and new trends in the science of extortion. Most of them had even installed a special mobile application, called Steal, and every week they gave the command "Update Now".

***

Frika Drifca also followed in the footsteps of the best. Ever since he was appointed head of the Agricultural and Rural Development Agency, Albanian agriculture has risen to the top. A total of 20 prominent farmers, cousins, friends and cronies of the government, constantly received funds to set up strawberry and strawberry greenhouses. The production increased so much that most Albanians went out on the streets with rims and mugs smeared with red, because they did not have time to clean them. There were plenty of other farmers who were ready to return half of the grant they received, and keep the better half for agricultural investment in Cyprus banks.

Fear faithfully followed the principle of packages with basmati (or kritharaq) on the chef's table, and as the people say, "who is good, don't let the weather get tough". The moment came and she became a minister. She proved tireless. He came around Albania and posted videos on Facebook of ten people's farms, greenhouses and flourishing agribusinesses, while the rest of the villagers, waiting for agricultural grants, had taken the boys for specialization in England, Germany and elsewhere.

***

Therefore, the news that the anti-corruption agency of the EU, OLAF, would investigate where the agricultural funds had ended up in Albania, took Frika Drifca out of her mind. At first he was shocked, then he got angry.

Unlike on any previous occasion, the Tall One wasn't saying half a word to defend him.

"This is meanness," he said to himself, "when Sajme's case came out, he protected Ter Koka for a year in a row as well." Gjushi is in prison, but he has not released him even to this day. Nobody talks about health tenders before and after the pandemic, before and after Ilir Beqe. Maybe Manastirllesha looks like strawberries to him, but I planted them. For Tigri, it appeared on TV for a year, showing pictures of fields with garbage covered with grass, while the incinerators were just facade sheets".

But he decided to react publicly. He wrote a long statement, when he said that the word corruption was not mentioned anywhere in the OLAF report. He even chose complicated words to make the response look like a scientific paper.

"It is a temporary stoppage of funds, to scan the situation and verify the final destination of the grants. "OLAF never mentions the word corruption," Frika wrote.

Technically, she was right. In the OLAF text announcing the ban on funding, there were only common technical terms such as thief, pickpocket, extortionist of European taxpayers' money, how is it possible that I Gjati has accidentally collected all the scumbags of public funds around him, and I personally don't know anything, then when the atrocities come out, he says that everyone must answer for himself, etc., etc.       

***      

Regarding this work of the globe and Interpol, Frika Drifca decided to do an in-depth study. It turned out that the world had a total of 193 member countries of the United Nations, plus Taiwan and Kosovo, as well as two countries with observer status, the Vatican and the State of Palestine. He removed Kosovo from the list because it is very close. He didn't like Dubai either because that city was mostly populated with Albanians.

As candidate countries to take refuge without fear of extradition, Taiwan, the Vatican and Palestine remained. Studying the new identity she could take, Frika selected the Chinese name Mei Gëk Mëk, and the Catholic Maria-Teresa Krifcone. But in the end he decided: He would take refuge in the Gaza Strip under the name Aisha al-Jambazi...

Note: Patronageist is a pro-cattle-and-agriculture, anti-theft satirical column      


Në përputhje me standarded JTI

Video

SHIKO KANALIN NE YOUTUBE
×